I want to send a big thanks out to those who commented on my last post. I generally try to respond to each individually but just couldn’t manage it this last week. We had a quite a bout with a nasty and persistent stomach bug around here. Just when daughter #3 was getting better, daughter #2 woke up with it!! On top of that, my husband and I both felt like we were fighting it all week. Fingers crossed and I think we are all on solid and “bug free” ground again!!
While I’m on the subject of health however, maybe it’s a good time to share with you all some personal and difficult information. It’s sometimes hard for me to feel into exactly how much I should/feel comfortable sharing here. But I realize that in some way, sharing, even with “strangers”(I don’t really feel like many of you are stangers-you know who you are) could be beneficial to my process of healing. I consider myself to be a really healthy person; I’m an active mother of three who is very busy and leads a pretty full life. Like many of us women/moms, I find myself putting my children and their needs first, and frankly the needs of just about everyone else in my life….. I’m certain I’m not the only mama who does that. Well, as admirable as they may seem, I have recently had a clear realization that that way of life is not serving me or my family! I have been dealing with chronic and intense pain in my legs and hips along with frequent and severe headaches for a few years now. This condition has only been getting worse over the last year!! After having my last baby, our third all natural, home delivery, Miss N who weighed in at 10lb. 4oz, I think my body just went… “uncle” and has been asking me to slow down and respect it, ever since!!
What does that mean? Well, right now it means less time sewing/quilting/blogging and more time going to various appointments with every type of healer/doctor/herbalist, etc imaginable. It also means spending more time at my local yoga studio and getting back on the hiking trails more often (I have been told recently that running is likely not a good thing for my body-dissappointing). I have made a firm commitment to myself that I matter and that my physical and emotional health are both incredibly important to the health and well-being of my family, not to mention the obvious-me! If you have been reading this blog for a couple of years now, you may know that I have struggled occasionally, as we all likely do, with finding a balance between family, life obligations and quilting, or any creative endeavor for that matter. What has made that struggle easier however, is this constant pain that is becoming quite debilitating and at the same time nagging and “loud” for me. It is not going to go away without me stopping to address it. “Damn it, listen to me” it seems to be saying! And so I hear the call…. finally.
SO, why am I telling you all this? well, not sure exactly except that this blog and my work with quilting/creating is very important to me. I have enjoyed getting to know many of you frequent visitors and appreciate the inspiration and encouragement I gain from you. I have no plans to stop quilting or blogging however my health and family are my absolute #1 priority right now. I will be busy creating this summer here and there and will pop in to blog about it at times. My hope though for the summer is to get a handle on this pain and create a new and healthy rhythm for myself so that ultimately I can create/quilt/blog more that ever come this fall. That is my intention and I need to “speak” it in writing to you all in order to help me achieve that.
If you’ve made it this far down and have actually read this entire post, thank you! I know posts with pretty photos of quilts are much more fun to read, but this felt like one that needed to be written and I simply didn’t want to add photos to. I appreciate your readership and support and I wish you all a lovely and health filled summer!!!
in gratitude,
karen
***I realize it may be helpful to know where I am in my process of healing. Not only is the pain itself simply exhausting, it’s the not knowing why it’s there and how to help it go away that feels really scary. I mean I can’t possibly live like this forever……. can I? Anyway, a few years back, before this even got this bad, I had an MRI done, nerve testing done, lab tests for RA and lupus….. all came back fine and normal, with a possible small issue in my spine which I am now revisiting. I was under the care of a respected Naturopath who got my adrenals back on track but didn’t know what to do with my leg pain??? I have tried cranio-sacral therapy, which I love but didn’t seem to address the issue, I’ve tried traditional physical therapy- no luck! I’ve tried being on a consistent walk/run program to get my legs strong and active- great but not changing the pain in any way. Currently I am under the care of an extremely intuitive and holistic chiropractor in town and she is hopeful for results but admits that I am a challenging “case”. Yes, I’ve heard that one before- ha!! 🙂 So it isn’t as if I’ve been ignoring my health entirely, it’s just that I haven’t been dealing with it head on and with a solid conviction to change it, until very recently. Just wanted to give you that piece in hopes that this story might make a little more sense!! *****
Yes, and yes! See a doctor and maybe a Chiropractor. You might be amazed something as simple as your spine being out of alignment can cause all those symptoms. Smart idea to get checked out. Have a fun summer off! Thank you for sharing.
Taking care of yourself is the number one, and the rest always follows. Enjoy your ME time!
Thanks for taking the time, and being open enough, to share all of this. Your (and your family’s) health and well being should always be at the top of the list. I deal with chronic pain as well and can empathize both with the pain, and with how disruptive of life it can be. I hope you and your family get the healing you need!
Best wishes for a rapid and complete recovery! You can continue your quilt design process without sitting at the machine or cutting a single piece of fabric. Colored pencils or pastels and a sketchbook will give you a chance to try new ideas, even while sitting in a doctor’s waiting room. Good luck!
Judy
Best wishes to you. I also struggle with the pain thing, so I understand! And sometimes when bloggers share these kinds of things, it makes them more “real”, for lack of better words. After all, you are only humans too, and people should understand. Take care 🙂
I have enjoyed reading your blog. Take care of YOURSELF. It is the best thing you can do for you & your family.
” I mean I can’t possibly live like this forever……. can I? ”
Oh you sound like me two years ago, only with my shoulder/upper back, not my legs. The bad news is, yeah, you can live like that forever. The good news is you probably won’t have to, at least not to that degree. Long story short I was eventually diagnosed with fibromyalgia which is sort of a “nothing” diagnosis, but also finally got me some treatment that lets me deal and I feel a LOT better. The HUGE downside is I really had to cut down hugely on knitting, which was my thing like quilting is yours. It was hard and still makes me sad… but I’d rather be functioning on a daily basis than knitting and in serious pain.
Anyhoo, I hope you find a better answer and solution that lets you still do what you need and want while bringing the pain down to manageable.
hi Karen,
I don’t think that I’ve ever commented before but I’ve been reading your blog for a while and I really love your work. i can empathize with you. i have some medical issues with no answers and find it difficult to balance taking care of “me” and everything else. just wanted to let you know you aren’t alone and i hope you find some answers and relief soon.
take care,
brandy
thirteenquilts.blogspot.com
Thank you for taking the time to comment. This was a difficult post to write and I’m so touched to have all the kind support from you all. It definitlely helps to know we’re not alone in our struggles. Best of luck with your medical issues as well.
I also just gave birth to a 10 lb 5 oz baby and I am pretty well wrecked from it. I did get RA when he was a few months old. If it has been a few years since they tested you have them check again. Its my understanding that it does sometimes take a long time to show up on their tests. Also since it is joint pain Iwould try finding a rheumatologist.
Thinking of you. I hope you find answers and your body is able to heal. Good luck with everything.
I wish you the best as you take time for yourself and tackle a difficult issue. Pain in any form is NOT fun. I love reading your posts and seeing what you’ve been up to but totally understand your priorities. Enjoy summer. relax and conquer the pain.
Take care of yourself, and your family! Your children are your greatest creation, stitch them with care and devotion. They will hang forever in the Quilt Show called Life.
So true…. thank you for that lovely metaphor! 🙂
It’s good to know what your priorities are and should be! What sucks is that pain has become your new normal. As a person who deals with chronic climate migraines, I get it, but I’m lucky (?) enough to know what the cause of my pain is, even if there isn’t much in the way of a solution. I can only imagine how taxing and stressful it is to not know. I have found some relief with acupuncture – it might be worth a shot. I almost wonder if something got cracked or pinched or shifted when you had your last one and it healed just enough out of place to be invisible, but still cause intense grief. Regardless, I wish you health and a lasting solution to your pain!
I’m subscribed so i won’t miss a post when you do pop in. Thanks as always for the inspiration!
Thinking of you Karen… hope relief is just around the corner. Ditto on the rheumatologist suggestion – it’s been hugely beneficial to pain management in our family. xoxo
Hope you get better soon
I hope you find some answers. I can relate as I have had neck and shoulder pain for years and hip pain for over a year now. I’ve had s doctors blame stress so often that I just have stopped bothering with doctors.
I’m sorry to hear you’ve been suffering so. Be well! Wishing you the very best.
Thank you for sharing. Your work is inspiring. I know how you feel I was sick for the whole year last year without really knowing what was wrong and just not myself. I am now also in the position that I need to include me time to look after my health as well and get back to exercising and not so focussed on the quilting :-). I hope thing go better with the diagnose it is horrible not knowing what is wrong.
Thinking of you, Karen. So thankful that I found your blog and inspirational quilts. I wish you recovery, peace, time with family, and healing!!! Be well!
You really inspire me with your quilts, your love of family, and your dedication to doing what’s best for you. I’m sending you good thoughts and positive energy that you’ll soon be back to good health!
Karen, I’m so sorry you’ve been struggling. I’m sending you healing thoughts -and an email re: some local practitioners you may or may not wish to consider seeing. love, liz
Pain can be so difficult to be with ~ thank you for sharing about what’s going on with you. I think it can sometimes be really helpful in the healing process. Have you tried Acupuncture? it really helps me a lot.
Sending love and light your way.
elsa
Thanks so much Elsa! Acupuncture is actually next on my list of strategies! Glad to know it’s helping you.
Ooh Karen, I feel so bad for you. But very happy that you are going to take some time to yourself, and with your wonderful family, and hopefully get some answers and pain relief. Life would be so much easier without these ongoing difficulties, but maybe it’d be more boring too…
And just think how many ideas you’ll have for fabulous new quilts once you can get back to sewing again -you’ll be on fire!
Anyway, take it easy, keep smiling, and we’ll all look forward to seeing you (in person, and in blogland) very soon…
Dearest Karen,
It sounds like you are doing what you should be and need to do…good for you. I do enjoy your blog and I am thankful that you do choose to share your life with so many of us. I too have hip and leg troubles. Mine are from a nasty fall in a hot tub about 7 years ago. Shortly after that I got pregnant. Couldn’t do anything until the baby was born, 9lbs 4 oz. I had 3 injections, therapy and thought all would be good. I still have pain. When it gets to brothering me I wear The SI Belt by the saunders group. I wear it at night when I need to and it really helps the pain in my lower back, hips and legs. You might want to look into getting one. I pray that you find relief soon. Many blessings, Lee Ann
I’m so sorry to hear about your struggle with pain. I’ll be thinking of you.
It’s hard putting yourself first, but if you aren’t taken care of the rest of the family really isn’t either. Take care!
Take care of yourself and get well!
Sent from my iPhone
Karen,
hi im just catching up with your blog today. Sorry to hear of your health issues. i do hope you can find something that helps you to find some relief from pain. take good care of yourself. regards julie.
So sorry to read about your struggles with pain…but thank you for sharing with us, Karen. I’m glad you’re not quitting quilting or blogging–I really like your style and your ‘voice’. I’ve found that a lot of quilting can be done mentally or on paper while doing other things and giving your body a rest. Give yourself the care and rest you need, and feel better soon! Praying for you…God bless!
I am sorry to hear about your pain and I hope you can find a solution. I have had some things I’ve struggled with sharing on my blog and have found it really helps me to share. I hope it has helped you, I know I have found so much support and it looks like you are too. Take care of yourself and your family and the quilting will continue in some way or another.
I just stumbled onto your blog and wanted to offer something you could try for the leg pain. A friend of mine had really bad nerve pain in her legs and somehow discovered that eating grass fed butter consistently can make a huge difference. She used Kerrygold. You have to be consistent and it takes a while to have an impact. She is completely pain free now. (continues to eat a lot of the butter.) It heals the mylein sheath of the nerves.
Just something you could research for yourself. Wishing you all the best on your healing journey.
-Keri
PS I LOVE cranio sacral work. My absolute favorite!